Speaking
My Signature Message is an Antidote to Loneliness and Feelings of not Belonging
I’ve experienced loneliness even in the midst of a crowd and it’s a painful feeling. I was plagued for years by Loneliness and a belief I did not belong until I discovered my transformational system.
In 2024, 1 out of 2 people described themselves as lonely. People who claim loneliness, say they often struggle with anxiety, depression and even thoughts of suicide. Grief or loss processes can get stuck when there is a backdrop of loneliness.
Why Should We Care About Individuals Who Feel Lonely?
Loneliness is detrimental to our health. Employees may miss work and be less productive because as Surgeon General Vivek Murthy stated in 2024 “Loneliness heightens our risk for stress-related physical ailments like heart disease, stroke, dementia and even early death.” When we hold the belief that we are lonely and don’t belong, we tend to become apathetic at work and in our relationships.
My 5-step Process to release inner blocks from loneliness has immediate, tangible, beneficial effects in which people begin to discover they belong to life. The emotions of loneliness, unworthiness and belonging are intimately connected. For over three decades, I have been at the forefront of shame education, contributing significantly to the evolving landscape of psychological understanding since the 1980s. My extensive work with shame stems from my rich experience as a psychotherapist for over 30 years and my personal journey of transformation, particularly in overcoming the false belief of unworthiness. In the Spring of 2024 my chapter on Quantum Belonging will be published in a new book. (Title to be announced by the publisher any day.)
In my recent bestselling book, “When Wisdom Arrives: From Imagined Unworthiness to Freedom“, hundreds of individuals have been able to confront the erroneous belief that their thoughts, feelings, and past actions hinder their ability to experience well being now.
Here is a Sneak Peak of my method:
From Turmoil and Isolation to Well Being and Belonging
1) Identify the inner or outer issue that dominates your thoughts and feelings.
Is it related to wrongdoing, fixing your partner, past mistakes, stages of grief, your body, your finances, your deficiencies in work, relationships or friendships?
2) Rate the intensity of your distress on a scale of 1-10 with 10 being the most distressing.
Observe how your body tenses up as you focus on distress. Describe your breathing? Take a deeper breath and make your exhalation longer than your inhalation.
3) Pinpoint the specific struggle of Your Tug -Of -War With “What IS.”
For instance, thoughts like: it shouldn’t have happened, why did it happen, if they had or I had been different might have arisen in your mind with your repeating concern.
4) Recognize that you are either dwelling in the past with your thoughts and feelings or anticipating a fearful future.
Remember true freedom lies only in the present.
5) Acknowledge your desire to experience joy again.
I have a secret sauce that interrupts the looping thoughts and feelings that are keeping us stuck in isolation and unworthiness. My intervention releases our side of the tug-of-war. When our side of the tug-of-war drops we have new energy to foster connections. In the present moment we revisit the old concern. How does your body feel now? Is it less tense? Are you more relaxed? Has your distress level decreased compared to when we started?
I use my advanced training in trauma, grief, eating disorders and the Enneagram to demonstrate how audiences can transform their worries, fears, perceived guilt and imagined unworthiness into a life of satisfaction and groundedness fostering people’s connections with others. Loneliness and imagined unworthiness must be addressed internally before external efforts like meet-ups can succeed!
I love offering folks a release from their perceived suffering in favor of new possibilities of freedom, connection and belonging.
My 5 Step Transformational System to release the blocks to Loneliness and Belonging are perfect offerings for: Wellness Conferences, Grief Recovery, Trauma Resolution Retreats, Coaching and Psychotherapy Workshops, Spiritual- Wellness Groups, Businesses Groups devoted to employee empowerment and Healing Conferences
Bellevue, Washington Book Launch
Rosalyn Rouke lives the message of her work. She brings wisdom, peace and game changing ways of looking at the world. Like a beautiful mountain, she leaves audiences expanded, centered and anchored to their sacredness and oneness.
Listeners you may be in for the biggest treat you’ve ever had. Rosalyn is amazing and special and wonderful! Her book is a precious and a valuable read.
Rosalyn’s use of her voice to bring the characters to life is in perfect alignment with the spoken words. The nuanced vocal delivery of the characters in the audio version of When Wisdom Arrives evoke a beautiful emotional connection for the reader.
Rosalyn Rourke breaks new ground in the understanding of feelings, and of the availability of happiness in spite of grief. It’s the happiness of our “true self” that lies under the surface of all of our lives.The world needs to hear her fresh take on this subject, born from her own first-hand experience and her deep insight into that of others. Rourke understands that the “stages of grief” are far less set in stone than we’ve imagined them to be.
Rosalyn has been a featured speaker at my Sundays with Spirit service, delivering her inspirational talk on at least six occasions. Without exception, she has garnered glowing reviews from the audience. Her delivery is not only articulate and compelling but also deeply authentic, making her talks incredibly relatable.
When Rosalyn talks about grief and death or actually anything, people are riveted. Her lyrical voice and laser-like delivery of content captivates audiences. Rosalyn’s smile and energy from freedom cannot be faked!
I love parables because these simple stories shape our beliefs, challenge our perceptions, and inspire us to see the world in new ways.
These were my top 5 Parables: The Motive, The Richest Man in Babylon,The 5 AM Club,The Bible, The Alchemist. But now I have a 6th: When Wisdom Arrives: From Imagined Unworthiness To Freedom by Rosalyn Rourke, M.S.W.
Imagine if wisdom wasn’t just a concept, or a character in a book, but a real person. I’ve had the pleasure of meeting Rosalyn, and she possesses an extraordinary gift for teaching. Her patience, insight, and profound understanding of life and our choices are unparalleled. Her story sheds light on how family dynamics shape our professional and personal relationships.
Find your “QUANTUM BELONGING” to Empower Yourself Right Now. Yes the outer world can keep you out of stuff, but REAL BELONGING IS AN INSIDE JOB!
Rosalyn coined the phrase Quantum Belonging for a chapter in “Become Empowered: Echos of Grace & Strength,” slated for publication on April 25, 2024. How would it feel to know that there are no conditions to Quantum Belonging. You do not need more expertise, more worth, more accomplishments, more fixing or more of anything else for Quantum Belonging. Sneak Peak: quantum belonging is a lot like breathing. Deserving is not a prerequisite to the next breath. But no one can take that next breath for you, but you!
Inspirational Talks for Transformational Mind Set / Spiritual Groups or Sunday Services
Interwoven Destinies:
What if it will always feel like a choice because we are wired to experience a personality with thoughts and feelings in a body, but does that prove that we have free choice? If we try on destiny, does it feel freer or more constricted after we let go our disappointment that we are in charge? Does the belief in free choice actually hurt or help us? Beliefs affect our experience, but beliefs have no effect on Truth. Because we like the feeling of free choice, does that make it true?
What does it mean to believe in the "isness of life?”
Do we get a new moment if we release what has already happened?
What is Acceptance: Does it mean agreement?
Is Allowing just about recognizing what has happened and dropping the rope? How can we drop our side of the rope, when something is illegal, or just plain wrong?
Does the word “stage” of grief facilitate or block an opening to the final stage of “acceptance.”
Are we being “irresponsible" if we act as though everything is in the hands of Life, even though every thought and feeling seems personal?
Have we confused responsibility with blame and shame. What makes us act kind and generous?
If we take the credit in manifestation, are we willing to take the blame when things don’t go “our way?”
What does it mean to take things personally?
What other possibilities are there?
In True Oneness and in Quantum Mechanics there is a field where we might meet. The field is beyond right and wrong and beyond death and life.
What if death and life were just different energies?
Speaking & Podcasting
I’m available for podcasts, speaking engagements, interviews and more.
Find out how to empower your audience from the Inside Out!
The Next Steps Summit
Rosalyn was honored to join Alistair Hawkes at the Next Steps Summit to share her insights on burnout in life. (Is burnout a feeling, or numbness?)
Watch below to find out.
Professional Bio
Rosalyn Rourke, MSW
Rosalyn Rourke, MSW, is a two-time best-selling author. She worked for 30 + years as a psychotherapist, specializing in life and death issues, including suicidal ideation, eating disorders, and family constellation work. Trained in advanced trauma interventions through Smith College School for Social Work and post graduate work at Yale Psychiatric facilities, she brings a seasoned, mature perspective to living and dying well.
After the unexpected death of her daughter, Rosalyn’s perspective on grief profoundly shifted.
Rosalyn has developed a new paradigm of Grief that reframes loss as an opportunity for growth and meaning. The ‘Stages of grief’ need not be long held, but can be like other feelings that pass through us.
From Rosalyn’s perspective how we handle death is much like how we handle loss in other arenas including attachment, money, physical loss and so on. While we are motivated and energized, let’s develop our best strategies for living.
If thoughts and feelings were TRUTH, they would be called Facts. In the pages of this fable and companion memoir, we learn about TRUTH and the simple way we can transcend the lie of unworthiness. Imagined unworthiness shows up as a tyranny of thoughts and feelings that cause psychological suffering.
